To be praised by someone for hard work is a nice feeling. They know they are doing well and that they are heading somewhere. They learn from a young age that they are special and because of that, they should get praise for being themselves. They grow up on words of motivation and amazing speeches that could inspire anyone. However, as they grow older into adulthood, they notice they are getting nothing. They are not being showered in the “love” as they were before and do not know what people think of them and how they are doing because no one has told them. Low self-esteem and frustration are now bound to happen because no one is praising them for their hard work, even if their “hard work” is showing up on time. There has been a shift in modern society with the treatment of young adults. They have been raised to get a trophy at every turn of their life, which has affected their work ethic and views on life. Overall, the young generations have been negatively impacted by the practice of overpraising; this has caused them to be blinded to reality, be heavily reliant on meaningless compliments, and be the cause for a change in the workplace because of their constant need for praise.
To give some context, overpraising is the practice of giving an excessive amount of rewards (that can range from a piece of paper to a trophy) for every step of approval recognized. They will get an award or prize for every little thing they do even if that action is insignificant. A scenario of overpraising can be demonstrated in a situation in which there is a student that shows up to a soccer game and gets a ribbon solely for that reason. Another example can be a student that shows up early for school or is participating in class getting a sticker constantly solely for those reasons. To put these actions in simple terms, people who are over rewarded for every simple action or accomplishment are overpraised. In addition, this negative practice of overpraising did not come from nowhere.
The start of this modern-day addiction of overpraising started from somewhere and has been reinforced over and over again. It starts with a child at a young age in the home and in the classroom where they are constantly told that they are special. Since they are special, they deserve a prize, a prize for showing their presence. This pattern continues as the child grows up throughout the classroom, and the overpraising grows. The child gets praised for nicest handwriting, behavior, grades, being the quietest, or being the funniest. They get an award for everything. Though it makes sense, why would the classrooms and parents not reward their children at every step? They earned it. However, the classrooms and parents are not thinking of the consequences of their actions.
By showering the young generations with praise, they are not preparing these young people for the harsh realities of the world. As stated in the essay, “You Shouldn’t Get a Prize for Showing up”, “no amount of trophies can shield kids from the disappointment and challenges they’ll eventually face” (Armour 566). Overpraising can lead to a veil being placed over a child's face where they cannot see anything but how good they are; however, when faced with disappointment they are bound to be knocked down. Their self-esteem lowers and along with that goes their performance; they are not at the top anymore so what is the point of even trying.
In addition, if we apply the effects to the classroom, the place soon, unfortunately, becomes about winning. In the classroom and sports, unhealthy competition among children where that is all they care about is getting that “A+” or winning, and they must be good enough for that reward (Armour 565). They start to not care about critical feedback or the improvement of themselves but instead desire the spotlight because in a way that is their mini-high. The classroom, which considered by some to be the first teachers in life, reconstructs the child’s brain to only strive for that award, and nothing else because that is where they know they can get constant positive feedback. Instant gratification that they unconsciously blind themselves too.
This leads to the other problem of overpraising being that a person can become heavily reliant on it and develop a one-track-mind. Nancy Armour proposed the everyone-gets-a-prize idea “give kids incentives to always try their best and persevere…actually sends the opposite message” (565). By handing prizes out like free candy, that gives the child the encouragement to do something and to keep at it; however, that is basically the same thing as you get a prize for doing something or being there. That if anything does not teach children anything about perseverance or hard work but whatever they do they will get something for it. In addition, this leads to the simple mindset that praise means good, and no praise means bad. People are doing this generation a disservice by teaching them to have a one-track mind to the point of where it affects their performance in work life. A lawyer in the text, “The Compliment Complex” by Jeffrey Zaslow, states, “When [the younger employees are] not getting feedback, it makes them nervous” (605). Since they have been raised to be overpraised, the day they knew what praise felt like, it has fixed their mind in a certain way. Their mindset has now become black and white and heavily reliant on just a simple reward. They feel antsy if someone is not constantly giving them a pat on the back because they themselves do not even know their own self-worth. They must rely on someone else to tell them that they are good enough and are doing a good job and if anything, that is a pity. Overpraising has created a mindset where if you get anything but praise or a prize you are not a winner but a failure. Just imagine from childhood and a child’s participation in sports to adulthood to when they are working. It just means they cannot work for themselves making them unreliable for themselves. However, there is a point where the words or physical prizes become daily to the point where they mean nothing.
When compliments or praises have been handed out like free candy since youth; its true value will lose meaning and just become a regular thing in life. In Zaslow’s writing, he states, “people’s positive traits can be exaggerated until the words feel meaningless” and it just becomes “‘everyday speech’” (603). It’s quite ironic because the younger generation is working for that instant feedback only to not believe in it because of its overuse. As a result, excessive compliments have a negative impact in the workplace. Their leader or supervisor may say they are great, however, since that has been said to them so many times the value of those words have been lost. The person is less likely to believe in themselves and become miserable. In addition, if that person recently failed or did not get a compliment on a task completed the aftereffects are worst with possibly depression. In addition, the outcome ironically could be a demand for more praise and not give with words but something more physically, and that is where the workplace must accommodate this new need.
There has been a change in the workplace between employee and employer now that the young generations once a child has grown up and that too is the continuation of overpraise. Understanding the effects of overpraising on children and their addiction and dependence on it; it would make sense that they would bring this mindset with them in the workplace to where employers soon recognized. In Zaslow’s essay, he states, “Younger [workers] complained that they were frustrated; after working hard…they’d receive no praise” (605). If anything, this first shows how these workers' raises on being overpraised cannot work for themselves and need a pat on the back at every turn. People work hard every day and many do not get praised; however, they know they did a good job because they are personally responsible for their own work. It shows that these workers are still in the mindset of when they were children and if that is not sad, it is a pity. It demonstrates how self-centered overpraised people are and need to have constant recognition. Furthermore, if an employee is unhappy with the treatment they are getting, they can easily leave the job and find one where they will be treated “better”.
Meaning, companies must continue the negative practice of overpraising or they will lose their young workers. Employers must give out prizes like stickers, confetti surprises, and frequent employee of the month to satisfy the needs of their employees. Companies in some instances will possibly need to set up a team of people dedicated to giving employees prizes and keeping track of their every move. Companies now must be their employee’s babysitter making sure they are doing their job, but also give them an award at every step. These actions put immense pressure on employers who feel “handcuffed by the language of self-esteem” (Zaslow 606). Employers cannot even be honest with their young employer without the risk of losing them. Companies are unable to escape this unbeneficial practice. In all, the self-centered practice of overpraising has done a change to the workplace for the survival of the workplace. However, it is understandable for the practice of overpraising.
The flipside to overpraising is that it can give people the motivation to work hard and to keep ongoing. It gives them higher self-esteem and a reason to believe in their abilities. It is true that it is a harsh world that many people live in that brings many people down every day. Having a boost of dopamine can really help a person. It may blind people from harsh realities but in one light, it may help a person when they are dealing with negativity. However, there is a saying that too much of something is not always good.
The problem with overpraising is that is has been overused to the point where it has a more negative impact than positive that affects different aspects of life. People without knowing become blinded by the harsh world, with a veil that does not protect them from the feeling of failure. One knows the unknown feeling of failure will instantly trump one’s own self-esteem built on compliments. In addition, these people can become so blinded that they cannot even recognize and accept criticism. This can cause more damage than good. In addition, that boost of dopamine can turn into a constant need for accolades. This young generation surely believes in their abilities at work and in the classroom but must have someone constantly patting them on the back in order to believe it. This moment has transformed into expected everyday treatment; therefore, these people make and want themselves to be the center of attention and require more from the people, essentially lose the value of a compliment.
Everything should be done with moderation and overpraise is something that has not and has had a strong impact on modern society and how it functions. This is something has been put into action since a generation youth and had now has crept into adulthood creating an inconvenience for everyone. Nothing is learned with excessive compliments and society has lost the value of a simple compliment. If anything, overpraising has made the younger generation a narcissistic group of people who are still children. They will never know how to recognize and put into action hard work for themselves.
Works Cited
Armour, Nancy. “You Shouldn’t Get a Prize for Showing Up”. Subject & Strategy: A Writers Reader, edited by Paul Eschholz and Alfred Rosa, Bedford/St. Martin, 2017, pp. 564-566.
Zaslow, Jeffrey. “The Compliment Complex”. Subject & Strategy: A Writers Reader, edited by Paul Eschholz and Alfred Rosa, Bedford/St. Martin, 2017, pp. 602-607.
Comments